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Sunday, February 26
Thrill.
This loneliness is killing me inside.
And this pain is more than I can bear.
I need something, someone, soon.
I'm slowly fading fast.
Hold me, thrill me, kiss me, kill me.
here's the knife, now kill me.
wah sian. <--- click this link to end your life.
your eyes say you love me.
WHEEEEE,
today was a good day -
I feel like doing a lil victory dance.
WHY today was a good day?
1) passed my Basic Theory!
2) got my first ever paycheck.
3) got $40 tips - TEEHEEHEE.
4) drove a car for the first time in my basement carpark!
5) have 2 work-free days ahead of me.
6) it seems people still care.
but then again,
on the flip side, I got muchos to do!
1) prepare Sunday School lesson
2) logo design for Aspire Media website.
3) worship for BAY this Saturday
4) sign up for practical driving lessons
5) prepare course pre-requisites for Uni
sorry lah,
I know this is boring stuff.
I just like listing things, it makes me feel more organised and determined. of course, feel being the keyword here.
you have permission to shoot me.
alright, to be honest I don't see how this might be vaguely entertaining to you - but I'll do it anyway, eh?
so here goes.
7 things that make me smile:
1. tom yam
2. my silly classmates (ie. Koonie, Vig, Jerm)
3. PINK PANTHER! (well, laugh like a nutcase is more like it.)
4. final touches to my designs
5. jamming
6. timo!
7. seeing _______. ;)
7 ways to win my heart:
1. look like Utt
2. a lifetime supply of tom yam
3. don't smoke and swear
4. ROSES!
5. humility
6. be funnier than me (rofl.)
7. love God.
7 things i believe in:
1. GOD, and His love.
2. tom yam makes the world go round.
3. my parents
4. E = mc²
5. Taylor guitars
6. you are gonna get me an Ipod video. (don't disappoint me now, friend.)
7. Sf is slow.
7 things im afraid of:
1. being afraid.
2. ghosts and creepy things (ie. Derek)
3. the dark (ie. Derek)
4. people leaving.
5. getting my arms/legs chopped off by a closing car door.
6. beggars
7. having to live my life w/o _______. (fill in the blanks hahaha.)
7 things i do everyday (or want to do):
1. wake up at 12pm
2. miss school
3. ponder upon the vestiges of my meaningless existence. (ie. watch Meteor Garden)
--
4. meet my friends
5. eat tom yam
6. go jamming!
7. go for judo training - need the exercise.
- - - - - -
7 people who should do this:
1. my bruddy.
2. Shufang
3. Khimkong
4. shifu
5. anonymous (yes, you.)
6. Tai
7. _______. (fill in your name here and GO DO NOW.)
nowwww,
wasn't that totally pointless and fun? :D
glad to be of service. now if you'll excuse me, I have to go get some lunch.
PS - I just realised the colours that I chose look like YY's Christmas-tree shirt, hahaha.
as we go on,
we remember.
hello, I miss you.
will we think about tomorrow like we think about now.
at this hour, I can only dream.
this is what I do when I'm up til' 4am (like so.) - YAWN! currently satisfactory, so I shall proceed to bed.
boo to you too!
oh, I miss this!
oh,
check this out haha!
I really miss all this CJ crap (or the likes of it).
sir, you can't have it your way.
this is gonna be a boring post.
today, I made 33bucks from tips, which is like more than my basic pay for 5h; didn't break anything; took the whole dining area by MYSELF (well, had some help here and there.); met a guy called Kenneth who says he was from SJI Judo and recognised me cause he went for training once; got the job as freelance designer for Aspire Media; missed my best friend after looking at old pictures; asked God for ______; wished I bought more pairs of my fake Nike shoes; wished upon a bright shiny star; threw away my Renu contact lense solution cause apparently it causes green eyes; started re-watching Meteor Garden -
everybody cringe!
and sleep tight, little bedbuggers.
"its the coolest day ever."
well,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRANDON!
I did this specially cause I'm nice and I happen to be online at this time w nothing much to do.
so cheers, mate :)
we're falling apart to half-time.
today Ivan spoke about mending broken relationships, and committing 'murder in our hearts and minds'. might've been kinda shocking - the easiest way to pass it off being to joke about it - but deep down inside I guess a certain part of your life has changed. at least, mine has.
but mending relationships isn't as easy as it sounds. off the top of my head, I can think of a few that I would like to mend terribly - but they strike me as impossibilities at the moment. I don't know what to say, where to begin, or even what needs to be fixed. all I know is that I don't want it to be like this, not this way.
you might say I'm tired of making the first move. maybe even afraid. but if you're reading this and you think I might be talking about you, well, please read on.
well first of all, I miss you.
not in any other sense, but that I miss your friendship. I miss the ridiculous things you say and do, I miss you scolding me for stoning over the phone, I miss beating your time at Bobby Carrot - and sadly I can;t even remember most of what else I miss, but its there I guess.
but don't get me wrong.
this is strictly platonic, as you might say. but all the same, I just wanted you to know. so all that being said, I hope you're treasuring what you have right now, and all the best - finally - from the bottom of my heart.
to someone else,
with something too far gone to mend,
perhaps there'll be a day -
when I forget it all began.
twinkle twinkle.
if I could have one wish tonight,
if I could have one wish tonight.
the stars still spell out your name.
you look pretty good to me.
alright, so I finally got this sweet lil' thing up. I know it ain't perfect, but there seems to be no possible way to link up my previous and next posts without disrupting my monthly archives. (we wouldn't want pages of daily achives flooding this page, would we now?) at least, that seems to be the idea I'm getting after searching the Web the entire night. so please make do for now, until another HTML HERO comes along and rescues us all from this tragic fate. if you wanna read the previous posts for some reason or other, just click the archives I suppose.
oh well.
sleepy and satisfied.
note to world -
PINK PANTHER totally rocks my socks!
you simply HAVE to go see it, its the funniest show I've ever seen, I swear. GO GO GO! to be honest, I wouldn't mind watching it again. gotta get my hands on some fake DVD or other.
inconsequential, really.
DID YOU KNOW?
It has been noted that each progressive Harry Potter movie sequel claims to be "deeper and darker" than its predecessor, so much so that experts calculate that by the time we get to the 7th installment of the much-acclaimed series, we will, in essense, be watching a black screen.
We hope you've enjoyed Daily Fun Facts with Cheryl. (that, unfortunately, do not really appear daily.) So stay tuned for the next episode!
Til then :)
just in time for the ending.
Err,
sorry about the previous post.
things written in bouts of moodiness tend to come out kinda bad. anyway, I'm okay guys - sorry for making anyone feel bad. hopefully, tomorrow will be a better today. or today, actually.
eh, guess what I broke 5 Corona beer bottles today. and they were FULL. lucky, it wasn't my fault cause some guy knocked into me. but woah, pingpangpiang was no joke - damn traumatising. alright! cheers to tomorrow! I mean today. and btw, go check out Museum of Twits and their new post about MapleStory. damn funny!
wouldn't it be nice?
wow, Tzarist collection.
this is something Shan knows I'll drool and go crazy over.
roses are orange.
well at least mine are! (:
I suppose Valentines' Day wasn't all that bad. thanks to all of you who did something or other to make me smile, be it gifts, flowers or just happy wishes. of course, seeing happy couples on the street still makes me want to kick them, but hey, I must say today I exercised a hell lot of self-control. applause! oh well, one day one day, I will spend the perfect Vday. I hope.
I'm giving up, I'm giving up slowly
I'm blending in so you won't even know me.
Drop a heart.
okay,
Happy Valentines' Day.
I will be working from 6-11 tomorrow night, so, yes. best Vday plans ever.
cheers.
holding on to thin air.
I miss the hand I never held,
I miss the way it would've felt.
I miss the smile that never came,
I miss your laughter all the same.
I miss your eyes looking into mine,
I missed a heartbeat, that moment in time.
I miss the words I longed to hear,
I miss the silence whenever you're near.
I miss the agony of losing my breath,
I miss the heart you put to death.
I miss the hurt, the lies, the tears,
I miss the way you ignite my fears.
I miss sitting there watching you,
I miss wishing that was all I could do.
(but most of all I just missed writing sappy love poems, and hence this.)
there's just one thing.
he never gave a damn reply.
I find it still gets me so, like you wouldn't know.
I'm two quarters and a heart down,
and I'm trying to forget how your voice sounds.
how long can we sing this song.
uh hello!
to sum up the week;
tips: 38 buckeroos (woot.)
hours worked: 17h
anti-Vday sentiments: increasingly strong.
good news: 11 Feb BAY Vday special!
$ spent: $22, haircut; $72, shopping.
Mexican food eaten: nachos, chimichangas, quesadillas.
newfound love: Florida's Natural sweets
wanna watch a movie: STILL DO!
no. of times got stood up: 1
no. of glasses broken: 1
no. of times I talked to God: not enough.
no. of times worried about A's: gazillion.
mantra: "Just wait and see."
gripe: "I'm sick of waiting."
its not a crime to rhyme.
today, I got early out of bed -
so no one can call me a sleepyhead.
my tummy was aching with a hunger pang
so I cooked some nuggets in a frying pan.
lazed around and surfed the Net,
didn't do dishes, made my mummy upset.
left the house slightly later than 1,
was rushing to town to meet Huishan.
but when I reached she still wasn't there
so I went to cut my hair.
my sister says I look like a Japanese doll,
but I'm rather satisfied overall.
after that we went for judo training;
realised our staminas are slowly fading.
taught a J1 girl to do break fall -
poor girl has no idea what else is in stall.
then after that rather slack training day,
we went down to town to have Subway.
the cookies are yummy, I have to admit
and so much for keeping fit.
then Shan left, and YY, Steffie and me
went to MOS Burger for some ice milk tea.
I was tired and decided to go home,
so here I am writing this poem.
its not much, but here I will say -
thanks to all those who made my day. (:
gg.
wah,
O's results coming out 10feb.
that's like damn soon, which can only mean ours will come out not too long later.
ohmanohman I am not ready for this, someone get me an inhaler.
whats in a name?
imagine,
if Stefanie Sun married like, oh I dunno, some guy whose surname is Tan (can't think of any at the moment), and she decided to keep her last name as well, she'd be like - Stefanie Sun-Tan.
or if Lydia Sum married a guy called Han, she'd be Lydia Han-Sum.
HAHA I can think of tonnes more weird ones, like Poh-Loh, or Ho-Sim, Soh-Lee. erm yeah. I'm freaking bored. come to think of it, Zeta-Jones is a damn cool name.
Cheryl Zeta-Lee, oh I like.
EMO RANT.
I hate 95% of all the customers.
I hate the way they can spend 4 hours worth of my pay on a plate of Nachos.
I hate them asking for ice water when I'm thirsting to death.
I hate the fact that they're so damn free and rich that they can hang out, buy all the drinks they want and laugh and talk with their freaking angmoh accents.
I hate the 600dollar bill and no tips.
I hate it when they smoke, its disgusting.
I hate, I hate, I hate!!!
I hate myself,
cause I'm just so freaking emo.
hahaah okay that felt good.
don't take all this too seriously please.
especially if you happen to be a customer at Cafe Iguana. (but if you really are, I HATE YOU FOR READING THIS!)
I hate you, and you, and YOU!
(and I miss everyone else, especially my best friend, hur.)
its fun to be emo.
everyboday now, ANGSTYYY!
yes, you can have your damn bill.
ever played Diner Dash?
well you can click to play.
after you're done, you may feel slightly frazzled and exhausted. take that, multiply hundred-fold, and you get my job. except the tips don't come that easy and the smile doesn't last that long.
do I sound like I'm complaining?
hell no! I made like $2.80 from tips today. its good, its all good.
ah, shut up.
the jewelled life.
I'm through with standing in line
to clubs we'll never get in
It's like the bottom of the ninth
and I'm never gonna win
This life hasn't turned out
quite the way I want it to be
(Tell me what you want)
I want a brand new house
on an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub big enough
for ten plus me
(Tell me what you need)
I'll need a credit card that's got no limit
And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
at thirty-seven thousand feet
(Been there done that)
I want a new tour bus full of old guitars
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard
Somewhere between Cher
and James Dean is fine for me
(So how ya gonna do it?)
I'm gonna trade this life
for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name
Cause we all just wanna
be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses
driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy
and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny
cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
in the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
with her bleach blond hair
Hey, hey I wanna be a rockstar
I wanna be great like Elvis
without the tassels
Hire eight body guards
that love to beat up assholes
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free
(I'll have a quesadilla on the house)
I'm gonna dress my ass
with the latest fashion
Get a front door key
to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that
loves to blow my money for me
And we'll hide out
in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary
and today's who's who
They'll get you anything
with that evil smile
Everybody's got a drug dealer
on speed dial
Hey, hey I wanna be a rockstar
I'm gonna sing those songs
that offend the censors
Gonna pop my pills
from a pez dispenser
Get washed-up singers
writing all my songs
Lip sync em every night so
I don't get 'em wrong
Hey, hey
I wanna be a rock star.
NICKELBACK